Thursday, 17 August 2017

Descriptive recounts

WALT: Use descriptive language to describe a recent recount.

Over the first few weeks of Term 3, Room 21 has been working on descriptive recounts about a memorable experience they had over the holidays. Below are a couple of examples of student work:

Plane ride to Wellington!

On the 21st of July 2017, my family and I flew to Wellington on a Jet Star airliner. The reason we were going to Wellington was because of my friend’s birthday party!

Screech! The car’s brakes screamed to a stop. I pushed the door open and sprang out of the charcoal- coloured car. I grabbed my bag and a medium-sized suitcase. As we ran across the zebra-crossing, a giant monstrous shape loomed around the corner and came speeding toward us! We just made it onto the footpath just before the truck rattled by. We then ran into the HUMONGOUS airport right before a group of tourists crowded the entrance. As we sprinted to the baggage check-in, my little sister was looking around, munching food. Next we jogged to security check. Finally, we boarded the plane. “Phew” I sighed.

“Please fasten your seatbelts.” The loud speaker said. Whoosh!  The plane lifted off the ground and zoomed into the sky. As soon as the plane had lifted off the ground and took-off into the sky, one of my ears had clogged up. “I hate planes,” I mumbled quietly to myself. I peeked out of the oval-shaped window and saw giant, fluffy clouds. Then suddenly, a huge plane zoomed by! It had a sleek, white body and tiny windows. It had its wheels down, meaning it was preparing to land. Ding! “You can now unfasten your seatbelts,” the loud speaker said. I opened the latch of the seatbelt and after a clicking sound, the belt loosened. “I’m tired,” I yawned and soon I was fast asleep.

Ding! Dong! “Please fasten your seatbelts. We are about to land in Wellington.” The speaker said. Finally! We got out after a long wait in the queue to get out of the plane. As we walked through the hallway to the airport, I could see my friends jumping up and down. I was excited to catch up with them!

- Written by Krishh Srivastava

My Mum’s Birthday

Chatter! Chatter! Chatter! I woke up to the sound of my parents chatting. Today was Friday the 14th of July the day right before my mum’s birthday and we still hadn’t got her a present! We had to do this as quick as birds. My dad and I had decided to get mum a wrist-watch.

After my dad came home from work, we drove off to St Lukes Mall to get my mum her birthday present. We had lots of choices of wrist-watches to choose from - it was a difficult decision. My dad and I finally decided on a rose gold coloured wrist-watch with a crystal clear dial. We also bought her a creamy red velvet cake which was really dense.

My dad and I were really happy and excited to surprise my mum. We planned to surprise her at 12am! Both of us are night owls which means we don't go to sleep that early, so it suited us well. My dad and I found a way to hide the wristwatch and the red velvet cake from mum, so she wouldn’t see it. We were really delighted and overjoyed to surprise her, and we couldn’t wait for her reaction!

It was finally 12 ‘o’clock and my mum had fallen asleep. My dad and I were really excited! We carefully placed a few candles on the cake. I brought my mom’s present and birthday card out. We started singing ‘Happy Birthday’ and my mom slowly woke up. I gave my mom her present and her birthday card as she carefully cut her cake. My mom was really surprised and delighted!

Later that evening, (when it was still my mum’s birthday) a few of my mom’s friends were coming over for tea. When they came over they wished my mom happy birthday, had tea and chatted for a while. Chit chat! Chit chat!

The day ended pretty well. My mom was very happy and joyful. She said that this birthday was the best birthday she’d ever had. She really liked her present and the birthday card we gave her. At the end of the day,we were all really overjoyed!
Wedding, Cake - Free images on PixabayFile:Junghans Max Bill Uhr.jpg - Wikimedia Commons

Written by Sandhya Senthilganesh


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Good Job Sandhiya and Krishh!
    I liked the way you guys added Personification.
    Next time you may like to add more interesting language features.
    Ka Rawe!

  3. Well Done Sandhiya and Krishh I liked the way you both used lots of descriptive language!

  4. Super writing, Room 21! Great description and onomatopoeia.